No-one says, “I am going to be judgmental to this person today, will not going to listen what they have to say no matter how true their part of the story is.”
Few people say, “I know whatever he said is true but I don’t think it is because I am always right & I trust my own gut feeling and instincts and also because whatever he says doesn’t fit in my part of the story.”
And it’s quite rare to have someone who says, “Yeah, I am really sorry to judge you before hearing your story, I shouldn’t have said that but you can understand that I was angry at that moment and not in the stage of listening to you but now I understand my mistake.”
Such kind of people are the one I like the most not because finally I got to prove that I was right because they realized their mistake and came back.
In fact, this year I got such few people back in my life thanks to “Apologizing Emails” I wrote to them, I wrote almost 11 emails to the people out of which 7 responded back and 5 people came back into my life and I realized how impatient was I to them. I realized my mistake and I said sorry though I came to realized it after couple of years and for some after half of a decade :P but hey, thanks guys for accepting me back.
The article is all about the people who jump to the conclusions without listening to other person. People who are just too stubborn and egoist to hear anything for one second what others have to say. They cling to their own views, own perspective and just sticks with it no matter how true the other person’s story or a point of view is, and you know what’s funny is even though the other person give them, show them every piece of evidence to prove them that whatever they think is wrong, they still keeps on ignoring it just because they don’t want to listen.
This year made me learn some very important lessons of life
by getting back few people back in my life and from a very important person
who left me.
You know, there comes a situation in everybody’s life where a person reacts impatiently, rudely, to a certain situation or a person and afterwards realizes how stupid and selfish were they to do such a thing. To be clear, it’s merely our vision, our perspective, our self-talk about whatever is going around us which makes us react. No-one is reasonable or to be more accurate, no one thinks they are being unreasonable. No-one wants to get proved wrong, no-one wants their “illusion” to break, everyone makes some story, everyone has certain belief, and just whenever someone comes in to tell them that “Hey !! This is wrong, listen to me or just look at this”, they simply ignore it and shout back. This is the most disgusting thing, trust me, I did it few times and I regretted it and so one of the most important thing I learned is “No matter how good your story is, how strong your facts are, how strong your belief is, always and I repeat ALWAYS listen to what others has to say”. There might be a chance that you miss out something, or that you might get a better suggestion to make your idea from just a start-up to a billion dollar company. This is what I am going to implement in myself from next year for sure as I don’t want to miss out any person in my life or to hurt them and definitely don’t wanna miss out any billion-dollar idea or opportunity. :D
This year I suffered, lot of things happened over a course of 8-9 months and I am not going to go in detail simply because it was horrible. If I have to summarize it, I would say..
“Looking over the ceiling as time flows, you sleep and woke up next day feeling exhausted, you look at the people around you and having no clue who they are, losing memories of over the past few years, a blurred vision always comes up which tells that there is something inside yours that you don’t know and it kills you from the inside, people try to make you come back from the situation but you know that this fight is going to be yours only and with oneself. In day-light you close your eyes and in night you get to see more clearly, you get accustomed so much to the darkness that even when you get near to the light at the end of the tunnel you don’t want to come out. I once saw three people ripping each other apart at the end of the corner of my room and that was okay until I saw the fourth person ripping himself apart, that 4th person was me in the room.”
It took me almost 4 months to get back myself on my feet with all the answers & memories that I forgot, putting every missing pieces to fall back into the exact way it should have been. It was hectic but it was necessary as well.
You know, there comes a situation in everybody’s life where a person reacts impatiently, rudely, to a certain situation or a person and afterwards realizes how stupid and selfish were they to do such a thing. To be clear, it’s merely our vision, our perspective, our self-talk about whatever is going around us which makes us react. No-one is reasonable or to be more accurate, no one thinks they are being unreasonable. No-one wants to get proved wrong, no-one wants their “illusion” to break, everyone makes some story, everyone has certain belief, and just whenever someone comes in to tell them that “Hey !! This is wrong, listen to me or just look at this”, they simply ignore it and shout back. This is the most disgusting thing, trust me, I did it few times and I regretted it and so one of the most important thing I learned is “No matter how good your story is, how strong your facts are, how strong your belief is, always and I repeat ALWAYS listen to what others has to say”. There might be a chance that you miss out something, or that you might get a better suggestion to make your idea from just a start-up to a billion dollar company. This is what I am going to implement in myself from next year for sure as I don’t want to miss out any person in my life or to hurt them and definitely don’t wanna miss out any billion-dollar idea or opportunity. :D
This year I suffered, lot of things happened over a course of 8-9 months and I am not going to go in detail simply because it was horrible. If I have to summarize it, I would say..
“Looking over the ceiling as time flows, you sleep and woke up next day feeling exhausted, you look at the people around you and having no clue who they are, losing memories of over the past few years, a blurred vision always comes up which tells that there is something inside yours that you don’t know and it kills you from the inside, people try to make you come back from the situation but you know that this fight is going to be yours only and with oneself. In day-light you close your eyes and in night you get to see more clearly, you get accustomed so much to the darkness that even when you get near to the light at the end of the tunnel you don’t want to come out. I once saw three people ripping each other apart at the end of the corner of my room and that was okay until I saw the fourth person ripping himself apart, that 4th person was me in the room.”
It took me almost 4 months to get back myself on my feet with all the answers & memories that I forgot, putting every missing pieces to fall back into the exact way it should have been. It was hectic but it was necessary as well.
My few best friends helped a lot to come out of this and, few
people whom I told this or people who saw me like that cried in front of me,
over the phone and I did whatever I can but still they did and I love you all
so much and I wish you stay the same in my life forever.
This whole thing has told me one more important thing which is “Not everyone who promised you to stay with you, stays with you till the end.”
This whole thing has told me one more important thing which is “Not everyone who promised you to stay with you, stays with you till the end.”
Even in this situation as well I get to see people jumping to
the conclusion and not listening to me. Few people didn’t believed so I called
them to have a look at me and to the whole situation, for few important people
I went to their home but they were just to stubborn not to listen or I should
say angry at that time and I know that their anger is something I understand
but what I can’t understand is why they have any problem regarding the
listening part?? Why people who blame you doesn’t want to listen to you?? Why
people who think they are right doesn’t want to hear what other person has to
say?? Let’s say if I think I am right about something then I should not fear
about anything else or any person and I simply should not have any problem in
hearing them out and even after everything if it turns out that I was wrong
then there should not be any hesitation in saying “I am sorry”.
Every person is different, everyone has certain level of understanding and their own perspective to react and to see things, that’s why people don’t respond well when someone points out how unreasonable and illogical their “perspective” / “thinking” / “illusion” is. Our worldview makes it really difficult to be empathetic because seeing the world through the eyes of someone else take so much effort and very few people has that ability to listen to people even though they think they are right, such kind of people are the one who gets to be at the top and that’s true.
I lost few people (one was really important) who didn’t listened to me when I try to confront them with the true thing, I don’t know whether they will gonna realize their mistake or not but I wish they do because I don’t want to miss out anyone else just because of this stupid kind of misunderstanding.
Out of the rest, few of my friends are just so fucking stubborn they just doesn’t want to listen to anything, they think they are right and that’s it. Period. And what’s funny is even when you show them the truth they still don’t want to believe it (HAHAHA !! :D) As a friend I guess it’s our responsibility to make them realize that this is wrong, not accepting that you are wrong is worst thing and I am pretty sure we all going to make them see through this.
And even after everything you did if certain person doesn’t want to listen then don’t force him/her to listen because when you explain things to the people without their consent they think you are lying to them and this again is the most important thing I learned that “never ever explain yourself to anyone unless they ask for it because explaining certain things makes your truth less truthful”. So if they say “don’t talk”, then DON’T; if they say “I don’t want to listen”, then DON’T SAY ANYTHING and if they say “Just leave me alone”, leave the place at once without looking back but look back to them with a smile if they call you back (those kind of people I love :*).
It’s certainly possible to change someone’s point of view or a belief towards a certain thing but it takes time and patience and most of all it takes the realization that ‘Yes! What I said (or did) was wrong and its time to rectify that”. In the short run, our ability to treat same person differently in different situations means that we can seek out people and correct the differences among us. When we open the door for the people who wants to say something to us, we are more likely to create an impact that we always wanted. So just listen, listen to the people first before making any decision, before doing something, before saying something, before jumping to the conclusion, before predicting an end of the story because remember this forever that..
Every person is different, everyone has certain level of understanding and their own perspective to react and to see things, that’s why people don’t respond well when someone points out how unreasonable and illogical their “perspective” / “thinking” / “illusion” is. Our worldview makes it really difficult to be empathetic because seeing the world through the eyes of someone else take so much effort and very few people has that ability to listen to people even though they think they are right, such kind of people are the one who gets to be at the top and that’s true.
I lost few people (one was really important) who didn’t listened to me when I try to confront them with the true thing, I don’t know whether they will gonna realize their mistake or not but I wish they do because I don’t want to miss out anyone else just because of this stupid kind of misunderstanding.
Out of the rest, few of my friends are just so fucking stubborn they just doesn’t want to listen to anything, they think they are right and that’s it. Period. And what’s funny is even when you show them the truth they still don’t want to believe it (HAHAHA !! :D) As a friend I guess it’s our responsibility to make them realize that this is wrong, not accepting that you are wrong is worst thing and I am pretty sure we all going to make them see through this.
And even after everything you did if certain person doesn’t want to listen then don’t force him/her to listen because when you explain things to the people without their consent they think you are lying to them and this again is the most important thing I learned that “never ever explain yourself to anyone unless they ask for it because explaining certain things makes your truth less truthful”. So if they say “don’t talk”, then DON’T; if they say “I don’t want to listen”, then DON’T SAY ANYTHING and if they say “Just leave me alone”, leave the place at once without looking back but look back to them with a smile if they call you back (those kind of people I love :*).
It’s certainly possible to change someone’s point of view or a belief towards a certain thing but it takes time and patience and most of all it takes the realization that ‘Yes! What I said (or did) was wrong and its time to rectify that”. In the short run, our ability to treat same person differently in different situations means that we can seek out people and correct the differences among us. When we open the door for the people who wants to say something to us, we are more likely to create an impact that we always wanted. So just listen, listen to the people first before making any decision, before doing something, before saying something, before jumping to the conclusion, before predicting an end of the story because remember this forever that..
There are always two side to every story. Understanding is a three edged sword. Your side, Their side and the truth in the middle. Get all the facts before you jump to the conclusions.
In the end, it wasn't so much that there was an alternative narrative, there always was - but for us it came down to one belief: Which one do you want to believe? Which one suited you best? or perhaps more to the point: Which one told you the story that you were already telling yourself for so long.
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